What you have seen come closer for many moons, that for which the departed had prepared herself and you, what she had dreaded for so long, has now come to pass and has come to an end so unexpectedly, so bitterly painful. It is almost incomprehensible to you that such a richly endowed human being, so young to her parents, to her husband, her children and her friends, has been torn away from them to follow her beloved sister into death, after difficult and long suffering. A human being whose spiritual strength let her look to the future even when her body was failing...! An unfathomable mystery surrounds man of which we become aware at such difficult moments.

And so we direct our thoughts to tomorrow’s portion in the Torah; it speaks of the passing of a woman. It tells of Miriam, sister of the great teacher Moses, who died in the midst of the desert, without reaching the Promised Land. The Torah has few words about death and burial and carries on with other events. But the Midrash brings these two events together with a thought of great beauty and deep meaning. It elaborates and tells us: When Miriam died and was buried in the desert, the waters dried up in the wells and springs. The life-giving and life-sustaining water was swallowed up in the desert sands. Yes, this is how you feel in this bitter hour: a source has dried up which had given life to you, her parents, to you her husband, to you her children and to you, her friends. And the strength of this bubbling spring was the strength of human life at its most beautiful. For—no lengthy speeches can say more than this one word; this person who has gone from us was a true human being in the fullest sense of the word.

(Hebrew) “The Righteous lives by his Faith and Trust” We want to take these words and place them above the picture we are piecing together if we want once more to experience the personality of this strong human being. It is the will of the departed that has clearly framed and defined what may be said about her. She does not want herself to be spoken of, for she always kept herself back. She wants that we speak of the Leitmotiv of her life, of the idea that was the vital force in shaping her life and personality – the idea of friendship. For she knew, only something as great, as more than personal, will remain, will stay as a true heritage for loved ones. “The Righteous lives by his faith.” Faith and trust were the distinctive mark of her being. When she gave of her friendship and received it in greater measure, with never a disappointment, it was not that weak friendship steeped in sentimentality, but the serious direct friendship whose initial strength comes from faith. It is faith in oneself which knows that the greatest and most sacred gift to mankind is God-given personality, which must be nurtured, so that it can blossom into relationships between people.

Already as a young woman working in her profession, she gained the respect and confidence and friendship of serious-minded men, placed in responsible positions, who knew the serious aspects of life. And these lasting friendships as, indeed, the friendships formed at school and during her first steps into maturity, have remained firm until the very last. Everyone tried to ease her greatest suffering in every way possible. The knowledge that she was surrounded by love gave her superhuman energy to force her spirit subdue the suffering of her body, and she made it her task to stay alive to be of real help to her family and friends.

(Hebrew) “The Righteous lives by his Faith”! It was faith in herself when she fought the losing battle against the great suffering she had to endure - for it was faith in her human condition that made her whole life a battle to be fought, that she never made anything easy for herself. She fought in her youth and she fought again at the side of her husband in these difficult days. Her energy, her will to live, her idealism, her goodness of heart and her considered judgment gave counsel in the most difficult situations – for her family and for all who came to her for advice. Endless was her willingness to give help to friends and also to strangers. She loved this life of challenge, loved it above all else because through it she forged her personality. And this is why she called out in her pain, “how beautiful is life,” when a few weeks ago, the deceiving hope of improvement and recovery and the possibility of active participation rose before her as a possibility. To fight for help called forth this cry. And thus, the battle she fought during her long illness became the symbol of her life.

With her strong will and spirit, she continued to help her husband, even when tied to her sick-bed and for a long time was no longer able to be active.With her example, she kept alive in her husband the belief that the spirit, when true to itself, is stronger than all material things. She was able to be a true mother to her children despite all difficulties, because she gave them her deep love which did not, nor did she wish it, put her own self and suffering first. And so she was able to be a loving daughter to her parents, whom she made happy simply with her presence, to the very end. For her husband she built an exemplary family life, more beautiful than can be achieved by those who are healthy. He could have said quite rightly that he need not worry about the future, if his life’s companion had been preserved for him, who was stronger with her weak body than all of us who are healthy and strong.

And now she has given up her fight. She has left us and rests in the care of the Almighty. Has the spring really dried up, seeped into the desert sand? No, never. It only seemed so at first. It was only arrested, and is still alive. For if much suffering inspires us with awe, deepest awe, it is because it makes us aware that there is something in us ordinary mortals that is greater than ourselves, and lifts us above everyday existence. Someone with such riches of spirit, who gained and kept true friendships in great number, who understood how to accept and give friendship, leaves behind for loved ones treasure which live on. You know this as parents, as husband and as friends.And the children: those two children should be told: even though you cannot yet understand the whole magnitude and awe-inspiring truth of this the event, know that your mother stays with you and gives you her blessing; that she is with you everywhere you go, to help you become strong and upright, as she was herself, strong in friendship by faith and justice, by love and dedication, by deed and humility.

(Hebrew) The Righteous lives, lives by his Faith!

“What has passed cannot return
but when it goes down shining
it casts back its light for many years.”

Amen!